In life, men often face a unique temptation when success arrives: the urge to seek validation and companionship from those who may not have stood by them during their toughest times. It’s a sad reality that some, once prosperity takes root, begin to forget the profound value of loyalty and commitment to the woman who shared their struggle. This isn't just a modern phenomenon; biblical narratives frequently warn against the intoxicating effects of prosperity and the shifting of allegiances it can inspire, especially within the sacred covenant of marriage.
The existence of a Shared Foundation Before the Success
Many married men experience the grind of life, working tirelessly and enduring hardships. During these challenging times, they often find their deepest solace and unwavering support in their wives, the women who truly shared in their struggles. These relationships are forged in the fires of mutual respect, understanding, and shared experiences, echoing the sentiment of Ecclesiastes 4:9-10: "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." This verse beautifully illustrates the strength and necessity of a wife's companionship during adversity. She wasn't just a partner; she was a co-laborer, a confidante, and a pillar of strength when foundations felt shaky.
However, once financial stability is achieved, the dynamics can shift dramatically. The very bonds forged in the crucible of hardship can be tested, often to their breaking point.
The Deception of "New" Attention
It's disturbingly easy to be drawn to the allure of attention from those who previously overlooked you. The desire for affirmation, perhaps from women who admire your newfound status or wealth, can tragically cloud your judgment. This leads men to seek out relationships that are not rooted in the deeper, foundational values of commitment, love, and the covenant you made before God. This behavior isn't just detrimental to yourself; it's a profound betrayal of the one who truly sacrificed alongside you.
Consider the words of Proverbs 27:10: "Do not forsake your friend or your father’s friend; do not go to your brother’s house when disaster strikes you—better a neighbor nearby than a brother far away." While applicable to friendships, its core principle speaks powerfully to the enduring value of steadfast relationships. The "new" attention, often superficial and transactional, stands in stark contrast to the steadfast, sacrificial presence of your wife, who shared your earlier burdens. This situation sadly mirrors the biblical principle of "fair-weather friends" who appear during good times but vanish in adversity.
Biblical Wisdom on Marital Fidelity and True Value
The Bible offers profound insights on the nature of marital relationships and the paramount importance of fidelity. Think on Proverbs 18:22, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord,". This verse isn't just about finding any wife; it’s about recognizing the divine favor in the one who stands with you, particularly the virtuous woman who has proven her worth through shared life. She is a "good thing" because of her character, her commitment, and her contributions, not her ability to complement your new social standing or wealth.
Furthermore, the New Testament provides clear guidance on the sanctity of marriage. Hebrews 13:4 declares, "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral." This is a solemn warning against infidelity, directly addressing the temptation to stray. 1 Peter 4:8 encourages us to "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." This underscores that deep, enduring love, the kind shared in a long-term marriage, is foundational, capable of weathering storms and overlooking imperfections, which superficial relationships cannot.
True marital love, as described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, "is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." These qualities are the very essence of a covenant relationship, the antithesis of fleeting desires fueled by newfound success.
The True Measure of Prosperity that is Beyond the Material
True success is not merely defined by financial gain or public acclaim, but by the integrity of our relationships, especially the sacred bond of marriage. As followers of Christ, we are called to reflect His unwavering love and faithfulness in our interactions. This unequivocally means valuing and honoring your wife—the one who has been with you through thick and thin. Recognize that true companionship, purpose, and fulfillment are built on a foundation far deeper than wealth or status.
Indeed, Matthew 6:33 reminds us to "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." This implies a prioritizing of spiritual values and right relationships, particularly within our families, over material pursuits. Your ultimate "riches" are found in your connection with God and the enduring, faithful love shared with your wife, not in your bank accounts. Proverbs 22:1 also states, "A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold." This highlights the lasting value of character and reputation, which are intrinsically linked to how we treat those closest to us, our wives.
Recommitting to Your Covenant
As you navigate the complexities of life and the allure of prosperity, it's crucial to reflect deeply on the motivations behind your choices in relationships. Are you seeking fleeting companionship for superficial validation, or are you actively nourishing the bond built on love, respect, shared faith, and a sacred covenant with your wife?
Let us strive to honor the woman who has supported us during our struggles and shared in our triumphs. In doing so, you not only cultivate healthier, more fulfilling relationships but also align yourselves more closely with the teachings of Christ, who exemplified unwavering love, loyalty, and selflessness. His own commitment to His "bride," the Church, even through its imperfections, serves as the ultimate model of faithfulness.
Closing thoughts
As you pursue your dreams and aspirations, brothers, do not ever forget the profound importance of the relationship that has shaped you more than any other: your marriage. By reaffirming your loyalty and integrity to your wife, you ensure that your success is not just measured in worldly terms but also in the richness and godliness of your most vital connection. Embrace the journey of life together, for in that unity, within the safety of your sacred covenant, you will find true strength, purpose, and enduring fulfillment.
What steps can a successful man take today to intentionally prioritize and reinvest in his marriage?
Exploring life, one thought at a time,
Yours dearly, Rumishael
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